Disappointment--and Happiness

I just read a book about dealing with disappointment.  We all experience it--although, I think our society sometimes glamorizes things so much that we think experiencing disappointment means there is something wrong with us.  But if we think about it, disappointment is a part of life, because none of us is perfect--and therefore, we all have the capacity to disappoint each other.  It is initially devastating, however--especially if you have not experienced a significant disappointment.  I remember the first time I was truly, absolutely disappointed in someone; it took me several days to get over it--and longer than that not to think about the disappointment with a mixture of anger and sadness.  Most of the time, we are at fault with disappointment--someone didn't do something we expected them to do.  We often have unrealistic expectations of others, and then are disappointed when they don't meet them.  I remember being newly married--it was wonderful, but at the same time I learned very quickly that it was not what I expected.  My husband will tell you the same thing.  Thankfully, we had taken a class about different personalities, so we knew that our actions toward each other were not a deliberate attempt to make the other feel bad or disappointed, but simply the result of us responding with our strengths.  We, like most couples are quite different--but we have learned (and are still learning) to accept and celebrate our differences.

I also think part of the reason we get disappointed is our concept of happiness.  I received "Despicable Me 2" as a Christmas present.  I love the music in this movie--especially this song, called, appropriately "Happy:"

 

Gru in this video is uncharacteristically happy--because he's "in love."  But all too soon, Gru's happiness is dashed--the gal he loves is being reassigned to Australia.  One of the more poignant parts of the movie is Gru going back through all of these locations--with a completely different reaction to the same people.  Happiness is great for the moment, but rarely lasts.  We are miserable, in fact, if we try to base our life on being happy.  That's why the Bible talks about joy; joy is knowing God is in control--no matter what is happening in our circumstances.  Philippians Chapter 2 talks about how Christ was able to endure the cross--it was for the joy set before him.  He wasn't joyful about what was going to happen to him on the cross--but about God's plan being fulfilled.   Now, don't get me wrong--I like being happy and love making others happy; but it's a fleeting emotion, not a building brick for life.

 

Life has ups and downs--but we don't have to go up and down with each circumstance.  I'm so grateful that God is sovereign and merciful.  I know that I disappoint Him often, but that His mercies are new every morning.  His faithfulness is great--and He will never disappoint.